The past few months have seemed to be a struggle for me spiritually. Many things have troubled me. I have let things get me down, and have become very overwhelmed with my spiritual walk with the Lord. But the Lord is ever merciful and knows just when to send comfort and strength.
Since we have lived here we have been looking for a larger house to move into. The house we live in now is a small 3 bedroom 1 bathroom house. Our landlady lives right above us, and with our large family and sometimes loud and rowdy children, I often fear that we are disturbing her. Having company over, and feeling like I can show true hospitality has really been a trial for me. I love to have the brethren in my home from time to time, but with our living situation, I have found this hard to do. We have tried to rent several different houses in the area, only to be told they decided to rent the house to someone else. I have prayed about this a lot, and I feel like the Lord has shown me that I a am very blessed to have a home to call my own, and no matter what the size I should still show hospitality to my brethren. So last weekend I invited over a couple families after church for dinner, and it really was great to have the brethren in my home once again. We were able to visit with one another on good things. It really was a great joy to me. I know that our house situation is only temporary, and this is just a learning time for me. I have no doubt that the Lord will bless us with a house large enough for our family, but it all has to be in his time and not mine.
Another thing that has been troublesome to me is....why did we move here? We have always loved this area. Sean and I both just really enjoy living in the Portland area. I really felt most of the reasons we enjoyed living here were carnal reasons. For example: better pay, nicer scenery, close to the coast etc. etc. I really feared that possibly we moved back here just because it is a place we enjoy living, and not because it was the place the Lord wanted us to be. I have questioned many times, what I our roll in this small assembly? Well after this weekend I believe the Lord confirmed that this is the place we are supposed to be. Sunday after church Isaiah gave his hand to Sean to be baptized. It truly was a wonderful day! With the Lord showing me moment by moment that he does have a plan for us in this place, and at the ordinance supper Sean received a prophesy that confirmed it all. I feel so blessed to be able to live in a place we love. And to have that place also be the place the Lord wants us is such a great joy.
I know that with each day I will face new circumstances, and new trials. But I truly believe God has great things in store for us here in this place. I am looking forward to seeing His will unfold, for us and all the brethren in this part, as we each grow as individuals and as an assembly. The Lord knows just when to give comfort and strength....I truly have been lifted up!